How is it possibly the best thing for you child?

There is a regular poster on WIR whom I like. She is very smart, very motivated and has overcome a lot in her life. However, she is currently stuck in a position which she hates. That position is full time stay at home mom with minimal opportunities to work evenings. There are other posters on there that every single time just praise her so much for making that sacrifice because it is the "best thing for the child". All I can say is give me a freaking break... like baby doesn't know that mom is miserable. It just does not compute to me. Yes, you make sacrifices for your child, but being resentful about being a stay at home parent doesn't seem like a sacrifice. It seems like freaking prison sentence for this woman. The baby is 21 months and her husband is under contract for his position for another year. They live in LA where childcare costs $1500-$2000 a month (unlike here where for that age, unpotty trained child you are talking $400-$500 a month, goes up to $600 for infants).

I just don't get it. If Bill is miserable with Baby Yo and our situation, we will work something else out. Our child may go to childcare, but do not get me wrong we will still be raising our baby. We value you our happiness. I think we have proved this by having Bill not go back to work full time. We are happier with him at home. Sure right now things are a bit tight, but not unmanageable. We are going to do what makes us happy. Who knows maybe we will both work part time (as long as I work 1000 hours a year, I still get vested for that year and Derek will let me keep my insurance through them). Bill will work for himself and I will work for Derek. I personally cannot imagine staying in a situation where we are miserable again. Bill was miserable at his last job, but he stayed and it was hard on us. I felt he was staying in a miserable situation for me and I didn't want him to do that for me. That is my take. Ask me in February what I think about staying home and all that and home much Bill is really helping me and I may have a different answer, but for now I think people need to look beyond "Oh it really is best for the child to be with a Stay at home parent"...really? Gag me with a spoon. Are we back in the 60s? We are in the 21st century. Work days are no longer just 8-5; you can work from home, you can work from Starbucks; you can work 4-10s; you can work part time. Why does everything have to fit in a little box? And why do people feel content to stuff you in that box?

Back to the poster on WIR, I think her problems actually stem from her DH. But I feel the woman that "made the sacrifice to be a stay at home parent" and back up her DH to the extreme do a disservice to woman and to the working world we live in today.

Sigh...That is what I get for asking advice

So, we got back from vacation and I just was not doing very good at work. Really I was doing very poorly. I was passing the time and not focusing. So, I talked with Derek some to try to get my head around what was going on and oh I don't know the fact that I didn't know the hours I was suppose to have in the job and getting a lecture over it when I was over and the fact that I didn't know deadlines and all that stuff really bogged me down.

So, I posted on WIR and I painted myself in the worst possible light on purpose. I didn't want to go back and forth about what was right and wrong. I just wanted some advise to communicate better with my boss. I posted this thread on Tuesday evening. It is still going and the latest post is I don't know how your boss has done anything wrong. UGH!!! I don't want to complain about what is right or wrong because he is the boss. I have screwed up. Probably not as badly as you all think I have, and my boss is not a freaking saint!

Prior to leaving for vacation all I knew was I had to get Pt. 7 done. 8 days before I left, I finally said hey btw what else do I need to get done and he rattles off 5 other projects!!! So Pt. 7 does not get done. Not really even close. The scope is about twice what everyone thought it would be. D says no worries TRD and I will finish it while you are gone. Of course when I come back all D has done is call up the client's PM and the architect to get them to go our way on a few things and they don't go for it. Other than that it does not get touched. I should have put money down on it and I would have won.

So, I get home and I am out of it. Seriously out of it. The pregnancy is driving me nuts and I can't tell anyone and it is M.H. last day and ught. Ok, so for 4 days, I sucked. But I still got stuff done.

You know it doesn't matter. I know what I have to do or not do. I need to stay off WIR for a long while.

What my brother doesn't know....

The saturday before Mother's day we got up to my parents in time for supper. Just a few minutes before my brother and his family arrived. I love my brother and I love his wife, but lord do they love to tease. So they were teasing me like crazy being like so you are pregnant. (and if they knew we were trying it is because they found out from 3 people that they don't talk to). So they were just giving us a hard time. I was getting mad during there teasing. Thinking man what if I was pregnant and going to tell everyone and they just totally screwed up my big announcement. But as it is I'm just waiting on my period to try again. So I just kept telling my brother "what do you know that I don't".

Well, Sunday was 5 weeks post period and I was thinking all my "symptoms" were in my head. Monday night we were at the campground near Niagara and I was like when we stop by the drug store tomorrow lets pick up a pregnancy test. So, we do and we walk all over Niagara on Tuesday. We got back to the campground and watched the sunset and before we eat I go went to the bathroom and POAS. I am staring at it walking back to the campsite and one line of the plus is very strong and the other is pretty faint and I am in SHOCK. I hand it too DH and was like I need to look at the instructions. So I grab the instructions and the line that is faint is the one that shows up or -. The one that is strong is plus. OMG. I just laughed hysterically. We are going to have a baby! Seriously!!

Anyway, we are still on vacation which is going great and it is kind of nice to find out on vacation because we aren't tempted to tell everyone we know right now!

Put me in Coach

Well, beat the drum and hold the phone - the sun came out today!

We're born again, there's new grass on the field.A

-roundin' third, and headed for home, it's a brown-eyed handsome man;

Anyone can understand the way I feel.

CHORUS:Oh, put me in, Coach - I'm ready to play today;

Put me in, Coach - I'm ready to play today;

Look at me, I can be Centerfield.

Well, I spent some time in the Mudville Nine, watchin' it from the bench;

You know I took some lumps when the Mighty Casey struck out.

So Say Hey Willie, tell Ty Cobb and Joe DiMaggio;

Don't say "it ain't so", you know the time is now.

Oh, put me in, Coach - I'm ready to play today;
Put me in, Coach - I'm ready to play today;
Look at me, I can be Centerfield.

Yeah! I got it, I got it!

Got a beat-up glove, a homemade bat, and brand-new pair of shoes
;You know I think it's time to give this game a ride.

Just to hit the ball and touch 'em all - a moment in the sun;(pop)

It's gone and you can tell that one goodbye!

So I heard this song on my way home after a LONG day and I was like you know this is going to be my moto tomorrow. My "role model" for tomorrow will be Cubs "rookie" Bobby Scales. He spent 11 years in the minors! 11 years and got called up yesterday and played today and got his first major league hit. So when my boss calls on me tomorrow, even though I am probably more Aramis Rameriez (the "long tenured star" of the team) than Bobby Scales. I am going to say Coach (boss) put me in. I can do it.

(I do have to add that the sun DID NOT come out to stay today, but oh well).

Vacation Planning

We are getting excited. The time is getting close. Just 5 days of work and we are out of here. We have a list of places to camp and reservations at Acadia National Park. It was a struggle. Niagara is so expensive even to camp. Campgrounds aren't going to be open yet in the Adirondacks and White Mountain area. State Parks were closed for an extended period of time in the Boston area due to a December Ice storm. Private Parks were expensive ($30 a night). But we found some reasonably priced alternatives.

AMJ and UB are going to be at Grandma's this weekend just to see me. :) My brother and his family are going to come over for supper on Saturday. Mom says Elisabeth is talking a little! OMG! She is getting so grown up.

Speaking of babies...I don't think I am pregnant but no period just yet. That does not really surprise me.

Now back to writing a report for the Hidden Valley.

Rain Rain Go Away

For the first time in our life together, my DH and I allowed the weather to dictate a major change in plans. Oh it affects little things all the time ... do I go walk/run on the road or do I use the elliptical? Do we work in the yard or clean the house? But we have never cancelled a weekend away because of the weather and we did today. We are suppose to be camping with the church this weekend, but we said not in this rain. They are calling for buckets of rain to fall in the next 3 days. Like 2-5 inches (of rain, not snow). THe James River rose 10' overnight!! 10'! Yikes. So while I am bummed. There is an upside... I can hopefully get some more projects wrapped up at work. I can give the house a thorough cleaning before leaving. Anyway, it is still raining. It makes me glad I live on top of the mountain.

Hmmmm...maybe?

We couldn't be this lucky, could we? I mean we just went off BC, could I truly be pregnant. I was going through my "symptoms". I still think it might all be in my head. This morning I was like no, I'm not pregnant. This is in my head. While I was thinking that, bang I got this huge wave a nausea. Seriously. I am still feeling queasy. I guess we will find out Sunday...or maybe it is the Swine Flu (j/k).